Wednesday, June 29, 2016

To Prince

Yo Hommes,
Little Bro,
I figured I pen out something I didnt say before you were gone.
I guess in many ways we lived lives, miles apart.

I know you looked up to me.
I know I also did things that made you question whether I took my responsibilities seriously
When you died,
I had a lot of questions.
I thought how your birthday had just been days before
How you asked me a question about energy
I was shocked you trusted me to ask me about it
You and I tended to fight
I was older and whitewashed in your eyes
You were the little brother I had to keep an eye on.
I know theres not much I could do to prevent your loss, your death
Your leaving
I felt guilty for a while thinking you were where you were that day based off of some advise or habit
I had taught you years earlier in my past.
Life went on after you passed
And I sat on this weird crossroad between the present and the past
You asked me about energy
And its funny because its you who visits me in my warning dreams
So I guess your energy lives on; somewhere
Im ready to step up and do more
Keep your eyes open from where your at.

Let Me Get Into Your Head Space: Help You In Your Head Space; Help You See Yourself More Clearly; Pretty/Handsome

I think more than anything, when life throws curve balls, you need someone to coach you back to life. Someone to encourage you. Yes, a great deal of the work is dependent on you and your ability to self motivate, but encouragement from the outside can really help you to see things better.

Life is beautiful. If you take a minute, to really write down all the things that have went wrong in your life; ie; your failures. Seriously, write them out. You would be surprised how your fear of failure might not be as debilitating as you think. Why would I say that?

Well, if you accept failure, as part of your road to success, you will find that where you are currently, IS a SUCCESS.

You made it through some things you thought would stop you, and destroy your life, and look at you; right now living life, not destroyed, and past what was possibly more than a couple of challenging tests. Hell, if you write them out, and really think about what you learned and how you came through it, they might seem smaller than they once were, maybe easy because you grew to the level to overcome. The only thing probably stopping you is the post traumatic stress of having to adapt to overcome; you're probably scared because you think it wasn't supposed to be hard or worried if you could handle it if faced again. I lived in my car for three months; you will be fine. But think about the skills you developed going through it, and how they play into making you more capable where you are today and where you are going. Think about it.

You did overcome.

You overcame. You overcame and you grew, and you learned something valuable. Really take second to think or write out what you learned in that situation.

This creates for you, a 'whats the worst that can happen?' hand book. If you accept your failures, most of them might not seem like failures when you come to review where they have taken you, what you have learned, and how you have grown.

You are more resilient and powerful than you think. I really cant help stressing writing these things down, because your subconscious mind isn't holding this in concretely. I can imagine that, you've experienced a weight being lifted, your confidence being boosted, and the fear of your past being reviewed; challenged , and accepted; but, I guarantee. Two sentences from that memory you had, you forgot. Kinda like when you look at your face in the mirror and you forget what you look like. You vaguely remember but not as clearly as looking at someone else's face. Weird right??

Where did I get this from? Today, I decided to get out and explore, and I took this little book that I bought 3 years ago with me, called Women's guide to Money. This book is great for men too. In it there are a series of exercises that help you understand your values about, money, life, your values, and your mind. Its crazy because if you are in a money crunch at any point in your life; it all has to do with your value system, any conflicts in goals with those values, lack of clarity of what you want and how to get it, fears, and essentially not thinking about it.

As a man thinketh, so he becomes; is a quote from the bible. Actually I have a couple, ' like Paul saying to encourage one another'. Having faith. I really would prefer if you picked up your bible to learn the word, than rely on me to teach; I'll speak it to you, but you really have to study it for yourself, and get it into your heart.

There was something else I thought about as I re-read portions of this book; finding post-its and book marks in sections I had pointed out 3 years past.

I'll share with you more in the near future the exercises, but I really have to sit down and write out these things for myself too, because there are some conflicts of what I want and what I value. Hey, Im in the trenches here with you.

But let me tell you; this thing works. I remember 3 years ago when I bought this book for a $1 from a used book store, when I was between jobs, and when I ran through the exercises, I mean literally two days later, I had two jobs and money was flowing to me left and right. And I can only say it had to do with a shift in my thinking, and being clear on my defining statements. And when the well would dry up, it was usually because I would go on auto-pilot, not thinking writing it out, and really reviewing my next steps, and real desires.

You gotta do it. I gotta do it.''

There's another thing I want to share with you, but I want to go focus for a minute and I'm really writing free form for you. If this gets any longer; I'm going to have to standardize it; and I really need to invest more time into me and my head space.

Bye !

Tuesday, June 21, 2016


I took this long nap in my car. It was amazing. I had been doing a lot of sleeping today. Processing things, dealing with that time of the month.
The one inside the car was the best- I don't know why but it was the most refreshing. My neck felt better, straighter; like something came off. Maybe it was because I took sometime to dance in the rain? Who knows but it felt good.

I woke up and it was already 10 pm and the neighbors across the street were surely shocked to see a head randomly pop up.

Got up went out. Freshened up. Three more post on the blog just for good luck.

We will be back to our coordinated scheduling and post. Be on the lookout for , who knows.

This post is only here to serve to show, you never know where your peace will come from.

Model: Crystal Okorie

Its Over

One more for the road

Get mad

Real mad

Post about it on twitter

Talk about it on social media

Think about it and let it simmer

How you looked for an enemy

An enemy that truly lies deep within you

How you focused on me

But I didnt focus on you

But I did pause,

Pause to notice where all this unnecessary energy was coming from

Some people call it envy

I call it, your loss

We can do this one more time for the road

But afterwards I have to get started on my calling

And I'll make sure security hinders your following me

Because this is really getting old

I did appreciate the break

I did find watching you entertaining

And then I caught on

How far off path it had gotten

I should have left you to self destruct

Im sure youve made yourself a life long enemy

Im not sure if I can shake you off

I put this one up in prayer

Lord bind those who come against me from now on


Youre on your own

Competition- Rejected!

We can do this a thousand times
How many times?
One thousand.
You say something
Then I say something
You do something
and I'll do something
and it wont be till one of us does nothing that we determine
Whose doing what best
When I get lazy
and you act crazy
I show up
and you blow up

I think we figured out what makes something the best.
Sit over there

I passed this test.

Why does it have to be negative?
Why do you care so much when I do mines?

You're getting a little too old for this.

I passed you when I wasn't trying.

Namaste as Our Souls Transcend Time

Why I let him go.

I had to let you go.
For your benefit and mines.
See I know you drive a hard bargain

and youll appreciate this in time

I cant stop you from the porn
the app that lets you seek out nude girls in your neighborhood

No, to fight you for them, would only lead to their resurface in time.

I couldnt fight you for your insecurity

And I couldnt let you continue to breed mines

All the ways I was right for you

You will appreciate in time

I had to reject you
I had to reject you this time
See you rejected something deep within me

It was what was good for you
So the shadow rejected me-
That's why.

And if I stayed the shadow would have destroyed it in time.
In days to come, you will yearn for me.

And will remember the part of me that was saved and divine
It is those parts you will remember
And you will change for the better in time

But I must reject you
I must reject you and heres why

Theres a beautiful life for me and you

And I have to ensure mines

The good in me will attract the good in you

But only if I respect it- and heres why

My soul recognizes the soul in you

It will all make sense in time

I dont know if I am meant for you
I am meant for you at this time

Our souls were meant to cross and grow

But for the long haul, I dont know if it is to reconnect with mines

My soul recognizes the soul in you

I love you deeply at this time

But for my soul to bring out the best in you

We must both grow and heres why

I have to reject you after you have rejected me

So that in truth your soul will fill in and remove its dark parts

I have to remove myself for you- because staying will create a soul struggle
And the risk of my shadows becoming greater than before are too great a threat

So I offer you this reconciliation in time

As I walk away from you at this present stance

If your soul purges and reemerges at an opportune time

To meet mine

Later in time

Namaste to a love

A love that transcended time

Photo: Art on the Edge14
Photographers: Zdravo abd Shalili
Model: Crystal Okorie

Healing hidden wounds

There are many ways we deal with the loss of something.

But just like the stages of dying.

We grapple with

and Acceptance.

Where are you? Why do we deny? Deny as if the reality is not based on factual information? We give a host of pre-emptive offers of what we can give to hold onto it instead. What is it about this thing that challenges our sense of happiness if we should come to lose it?

In life all things are temporary, and truthfully, we lived without it before.

Acceptance... Time heals all things.

Acceptance heals all things